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Damilola Adegbite, an actress, has opened up about her failed marriage to colleague and actor Chris Attoh for the first time, and how their seven-year-old son is now asking questions.
In a recent interview with Chude Jideonwo, the actress stated:
My marriage did not work out, but I learned a valuable lesson from it: love is not enough…
When you meet someone with whom you want to spend the rest of your life, love is insufficient…
For me, it’s over; the only regard I have for him now is that he’s the father of my son; I have no regrets.
When you have a child, well for me, the dynamics change, the things i say and do….he turned seven a few days ago and the he won’t always be seven, the questions are already coming, why is daddy not here, my friends’ dad did this….and all so I will rather let all the information later to him when he is old enough…it is hard to be able to strike a balance between the truth and what he needs to know now…he asks questions and it is hard to not be dishonest and at the same time not badmouth his father and reveal just enough….that is where the challenge is for me….i find it as a responsibility i have chosen to carry 100% and I am enjoying it….like now if I have to make some decisions, i will need to reach his dad etc…initially it was tough but now I’m riding with the waves”
Once a marriage doesn’t work, people see it as a bad thing….but I have seen that not every marriage was ordained by God but made on decisions thought was right…so divorce isn’t necessarily a bad thing…in my own situation, I fought till the end…I was strong for as long as I could be strong….so when the divorce came I knew i could handle it…..it is life…
Speaking further, Damilola Adegbite admonished single mums thus:
“Before getting a divorce, you are ready and prepared for the worst but the aftermath is the hardest part, what will people say, the public reaction….a tough struggle, but at the end of the day after the storm comes the calm, eventually everyone will move on….just be strong and find the strength.”